Whether you are happily married or lonely in your marriage, you have a tendency to date. There is an old saying that men are typically prone to bigamy. Whatever their reason of doing this, it does not validate them to cheat. However, many cases have been observed that some married people date other people outside the marriage.
What are the most common reasons why married people do this?
There are a lot of factors, really. The main problem is that, people find excuses by saying that, “We are only humans”. So, why do some married people do this? These are the reasons why:
Ego stroking. When you are married, you and your husband or wife becomes so busy with the things that you need at home. This may lead to an unappreciative attitude towards the other half. As a human, you need to feel good about yourself to get that self-confidence that you need. There are several cases that you get it from someone who is outside of your marriage. And, that is the start of it.
Yearning for adventure time. Yes, there is a true story. Once there was a married woman, who was holding a high position in a company. She dated all the newly hired good-looking young men and then got rid of them as soon as the thrill of cheating subsided.
Looking for a friend. Do you ever come to a point when your husband or wife is no longer your friend? Have you ever felt that something is pushing him or her away from you? Jealousy towards work, studies and children is so easy to develop especially if you are not getting even an hour of attention from your partner. You want someone to talk about your sadness and feeling of loneliness inside your marriage. That is why, married people tend to get a date in spite of their civil status.
What are the signs that your flirting actions leads to dating outside marriage?
Looking for signs along the way is the best thing to consider if you want to stop or continue. Flirting is healthy if you do not cross the line. But, it is hard to figure out that crossing the line. Here are the signs when flirting is paving its way to dating:
1. You keep your flirting a secret. This is because you know unconsciously or consciously that you have some hidden agenda.
2. You are spending a lot of time talking to this other person.
3. You know you are wrong but you keep on telling yourself that your actions are within safe limits.
4. If your husband or wife does not like your friendliness with that particular someone.
How to tell someone you are dating that you are Married?
So, you like this person and you really wanted to go on a date with him/her, in spite the fact that you are married. Here are some ways you can tell them about your married status:
1. Do not tell him/her on the first date. This might scare your fancy date away. Test the waters and look for signs. You will be the one to know when the right time comes. But, don’t wait too long.
2. Drop hints along the way. You may wear your wedding ring on some casual occasions. Sometimes, it is better if she finds out herself. Little by little. But, don’t wait until she confronts you on this.
3. Tell him/her yourself. If your date found your married status from someone else. There is a big possibility that your chance of dating him/her is over.
4. Do not be scared of telling your date about your marriage. You are in the Y2K and not in 1900’s. There are some single people who find dating a married person sexy. Especially with young women, some of them are going after married men. The sooner you inform them, the sooner your burden ends.
5. Plan your game. Yes, there are possible errors along the way. Planning makes it simple and you can handle things easier. Think of many possible scenarios on how your date might react. Play out all the possible outcomes to pacify him or her.
6. Act like an abandoned child. This is an attack to empathy. Especially with women, they have a tendency to mother a lost child. If you give such projections to her, chances are she will pity you and give you a second home rather than hate you for wanting to date her.
Tell your date that you are married as soon as possible but, do not confront them with the fact too soon. Some people love to date a married person so don’t keep it a secret for long. The sooner you reveal your status, the sooner you will find out.